Up a Pole or Draw a Line in the Sand - Can Teenage Girls Make a Choice in a Changing Culture, or Not.

Up a Pole or Draw a Line in the Sand ... Can Teenage Girls Make a Choice in a Changing Culture ... or Not  

Madonna says when she was criticized by a famous feminist as someone who objectifies women. She responded by saying:

‘If you are a feminist, you don’t have sexuality, you deny it. I am a different kind of feminist; I am a bad feminist.’ Madonna.

My heart and mind are troubled. I recently had a comment from a parent about my ebook (Teen Girl Faces Time in the Sand.) She thought the story was too much of a negative image about how social media affects teen girls’ behavior. She said, “Social media is like going to the mall to hang out…they will shake it off as they grow older.”

I wish I could so believe that the adolescent brain will survive neuronal passages based on messages of materialism, hyper sexuality, ego worship, and adult role-play as they develop more logical, deductive thinking skills.

The learning process cannot be relegated to the mall or cellphones as singular acts soon enough forgotten. Our brain creates a mental map of its environment with triggers for learning from sensory inputs to cognitive associations. It builds networks of perceptions, facts and combinations, encodes memories and habits, where breaking fixed assumptions and routines is hard to reset.

Neuroscientists and psychologists are able to explain how your brain is physically wired from your actions and emotions. These are neuronal connections based on what you do repeatedly in your life; both good and bad, which  are strengthened with repetition. Think of how many hours teen girls spend on social media or their choice of Selfies to get the most responses.

Therefore, if you want to change how you think or act, you need clear steps to break out of the habit, to experience and stimulate different neuronal pathways. So, what are the different steps that teen girls would be willing to take to adapt to other activities especially in this modern celebrity infused environment?

We all understand the brain has an amazing adaptive quality known as neuroplasticity. Teenagers will undoubtedly change as they mature, intact with long term memories and new explorations. My biggest fear and question is how the current environment will help or hinder them.

On one hand, at least 100 million people witnessed the Superbowl Pepsi Half-time Show with very talented singers and dancers, some main lusty performers who were 40 years old and older.  There was one male singer who appeared dressed from neck to toes in a silver trench coat, baggy pants with even a helmet to cover his head. The women had free flowing hair and dressed in skimpy outfits flouncing a tableau of every kind of sexually suggestive movement imaginable.  One actually climbed a pole and performed a style of stripper pole dance with the briefest thong visible in a costume.

So, here is the question: Is this sexualized image of gyrating and twerking women a matter for only one night’s entertainment? Or is this an acceptable common social landscape and modeling for our young teen girls?  Or the young teen boys who view such female extravaganza as desirable, worthy to emulate? Does any kind of push-back exist, or does it even matter? Have we crossed the line to no return to civility?

Has our cultural narrative changed so gradually that simple sexual objectification of women is normalized with accolades for this kind of performance?  What does that communicate about thoughts, feelings, relationships  or how love is manifested? Overt sexual displays by beautiful women have nothing to do with getting to know another person over time with all their feelings and thoughts.

How deep is our culture embedded in disrespect when society can’t seem to stand up for itself? What kind of reality matters when facts can be twisted to suit the influencers, when lies matter? The silent majority have experience, insight and wisdom but may be intimidated or anxious not to be overwhelmed by mass media.

 When did our normal social rites of passage begin to disintegrate from tolerance, decency, trust, and equality to degrees of violence, intimidation or hierarchies…to belong or not to belong with or without discrimination? Is there a visible enemy or a monster to fight against with what tools?

The latest teen girl pop sensation is described as having a “gothic-horror aesthetic” dressed in a canvas sack whose music represents the Gen-Z generation without gender but defined image her music crying for privacy with  anxiety and apathy. Recently, a Gen-Zer, raised on social media, states on a TV interview she sees nothing wrong with spending money on plastic surgery "if it makes you  look and feel good."

And new research continues to stream in with studies that now are using MIR technology to measure responses  and long-term studies are evaluating what happens after a number of years of exposure in this grand social experment.

New Research on How Social Media Affects Adolescent Brains is a Sad Confirmation and SeriousCall-out

Stunning NewFacts about Mental Health Conditions among Teenagers from WHO - World HealthOrganization Oct.23. 2019

To the mother who feels her teen daughter will just “shake it off,” I’m not sure it will be that easy in a changing culture where celebrations of female sexuality can be viewed as relative to bar scenes or porn videos where lonely men and prepubescent males go to watch strippers to satisfy their fantasies and continue the thread of misogyny. Girls can learn to work a pole. 

 I believe it is time to draw a line in the sand. On one side are our basic norms to stay healthy and moral, democratic with trust and consensus,  smart with introspection versus distraction, where teen girls have time to create their independent roles into womanhood and motherhood without imposition.  On the other side, there will continue to be the influencers with bully pulpits, the wolves in sheep clothing, the celebrities hanging from stripper poles.   

 Questions and comments are always important. What is your opinion? Has our cultural norms crossed the moral line in the sand? Is Social Media benign or malignant? What tools can young people use to counter this invader and raise their voices for freedom?

Sincerely,
Annemarie
amarie10@gmail.com 
833 471 4661 (please leave a message and best time to chat)
https://helpfulmindstreamforchanges.com


EXCERPT: Teen Girl Faces Time in the Sand ... a Timely Tale of Social Media Struggles, Regrets and Survival with Superpower Tool: (plus Kindle)

You know how all the great myths about superheroes are about their journeys to overcome problems and teach us morals between right and wrong. Today the real tragedy with young people is how to overcome the huge problems created by a Giant Media Monster; like a Medusa manipulator using her vast army of words and images to twist, to seduce and undermine the ability of people to think critically and freely. It's like a vast army of fake selfies attacking what's good and normal.

The great personal tragedy is made worse because most young people do not use their real characters to take offensive action but rather create their own fake Selfies to closely reflect what the Media Monster promotes. These are soldiers on the same side with the same goals which means the Monster wins every time. Like I said before, the Monster has no regret for what it is doing; it will never apologize if you keep liking her artificial ugliness again and again.